"Say" by John Mayer was the theme song for the 2007 film The Bucket List. I actually just saw the film for the first time this morning. While it got mixed reviews, I really enjoyed it; I found it to be a very heartwarming movie.
When I was younger, the concept of a bucket list seemed to only be about far out, one-off, random activities that people hoped to do at some point in their lives. Whether talking to adults or children, people often talked about extreme activities such as skydiving, bungee jumping, or climbing a mountain or exotic trips such as going on a Caribbean cruise or traveling through the Hawaiian islands.
Over the years, I have learned that bucket lists are not just about heart pounding adventures. There are numerous goals that people have that are quite thrilling to them, even if they would come across as simple or mundane to other people. As the movie The Bucket List showed, some of the best goals are simple yet profound gestures that touch the lives of other people.
As I continue my journey through life, I have grown to understand that a person's goals and bucket list represent the truest form of himself/herself. Pursuing these goals is not selfish. Rather, not pursuing these goals is neglectful.
In life, it is pretty easy to get beat up by challenges such as personal finances and difficult work environments. Although the messages that we 'need to be practical' and 'need to be realistic' are true, they are not the end all, be all. Removing the passion from life can turn a person into a mindless robot locked into meaningless routines. In turn, the person can exist without really living.
Likewise, a bucket list is not just something that we come up with once and never revise. As we experience life and grow in understanding, our views and values evolve. Some items rightfully stay on the list while other important items get added as top priorities.
Here is a picture about life goals that I drew for an English class project during my junior year of high school:
In looking at it, I have stayed fairly true to these goals. Granted, I no longer think of getting on Jeopardy! as being a priority of mine, but the other goals and activities still have quite a bit of meaning. I continue to write, draw, and learn how to play music by ear; I make friends and date from time to time. I continue to hone my knowledge of basketball so that I can coach someday, staying open to coaching boys or girls of different ages.
Looking at this picture again today, the title "businessman" stands out to me. Through reflection and introspection, I know that my decision to be a business major was made at age 15, right after I stopped playing basketball and my grandmother passed away. I had a very limited view of life and was working my hardest to get a full scholarship to college, because I did not want to have any debts. I was an intelligent hard worker, so business seemed to be the right fit.
Yet, looking back, money (outside of being able to have a family and avoiding debt) never really motivated me. Rather, my natural disposition was always to help people. My values and talents have always been those of a counselor, a teacher, and a coach. I know now that my concept of being a businessperson was off. While I will participate in business and run businesses in some form or another, I do not belong in contemporary corporate America. Rather, I belong in service of others, with my business skills helping me run my service ventures and creative freelance ventures on the side.
Two weeks ago, my favorite sports team--the Cleveland Cavaliers--won the NBA championship. (There was a time where I wanted to play for them or work for them in some capacity or another. For the time being, I am enjoying running the blog website CAVS.SPACE.) It was great seeing the joy and enthusiasm of Cavs fans in Northeast Ohio and across the globe. At the same time, I was left with the awesome thought--what is more surreal: the Cavs winning their first championship or me going back to school the day after Game 7?
As I mentioned a couple months ago, I have been thinking about a new mantra over the past several months: "Lead with your bucket list." At that time, I stated: "By living my life with my bucket list in mind, I will be able to contribute my gifts to society--and, in turn, will experience both success and happiness." I am now working towards becoming a career counselor and EAP (employee assistance program) counselor in order to help other people make career decisions and deal with other life challenges.
One of my first assignments for my first class back in graduate school was to watch The Breakfast Club--another really good movie. Whether in high school or in adulthood, it is quite normal to have questions about one's image and one's role in society. Having thought about my bucket list, I now see my identity as a businessman as a secondary part of me. Who am I? I am a counselor, a teacher, and a coach.